Today was Micah's 1st vaccination and let's just say that it's been a long day already. My poor baby cried sooo hard and was so red when they poked him with 4 needles!!! All I kept thinking about was 'make it stop!' please, 'make it stop' but there was nothing I could do. I felt so helpless and so weak at the same time. When I turned him over and saw his face, my heart just broke. There were tears and mucus and sweat all over his little face! I wanted to cry too but I told myself to be strong for him so I didn't. I should have cried! it totally drained me after that!! How can something so painful be good for him in the end??? I guess that's how it goes. Life is pain sometimes. It was so crazy because whenever he would finally settle down and the nurse would talk, he would cry hard again. That happened like 4 times! I guess he associated the nurse's voice as something that is not good at all. I am so proud of my little boy. He still managed a few smiles when we got home. But an hour later, it was all non-stop crying. It was hard to soothe him and every time he woke up he just starts crying hard. So I guess I should be getting to bed early tonight because I know that I'm going to be up a few times for sure.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to what week 10 will bring us. Just when you think you're doing ok, they have to arrange it so the vaccination takes place at that exact time. I'm sorry if I sound like I'm complaining. I should be thankful really. We live in such amazing country to get vaccinations for our kids for free so that they don't get sick. I can only imagine other countries that have to pay for it or don't have it at all. I know we take it for granted sometimes. I'm just very thankful right now even though it makes my son a little crabby for a couple of days.
Control - is one thing I seem to not have lately. I guess I probably lost that after baby came huh....it's just taking me awhile to realize it or hit me in the face. Control over the little things that I have to do: like return calls, book appointments, tidy up the house, write down my goals, work out, even being a mom. I don't know, maybe its just how I am. I was a very organized person and now I can't even organize a single thing! It is very frustrating but I guess maybe it's just a phase that you go through after you give birth. Anyway, blah blah blah...I should get going here. It feels good to blog about it though.
One last thing: be thankful for what you have!
ciao,
K
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1 comment:
You will get control back. It just takes time. That and you may not care about the control as much. My life totally slowed down after Lucas.
Poor Micah and the needles. It is horrible, but you'll remember it way longer then he will. If he didn't have a reaction this time you could give him a little tylenol next time to lessen the pain.
Jenn
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